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08/02/2006: "Losing Part of My Identity"

The paperwork is just being finished for my temporary disability leave from the Contra Costa County Office of Education. It has been a real struggle for me to make this decision. Some time ago I posted a list of what the scientists and doctors have concluded to be the cause of cancer. I have tried my best to tackle all of them with the exception of “stress.” Taking a break from work and increasing my exercise routine are the beginning of that effort.

The problem is, I love my work. Not only is the CCCOE a great agency to work for, but my job and members of my team are more than I could ask for. Today, our team had a retreat where we had the opportunity to discuss our responsibilities and expectations of each other. The experience reconfirmed my love for the projects and people around me.

Much of my self-image is tied up in the level I have attained and who I am in my career. I am proud of what I have achieved and what I do. Like retiring, leaving that is like losing a part of my identity. Just another reason why I hope this cancer thing is just a temporary set back.

Replies: 3 Comments

on Tuesday, August 8th, Bonnie Marks said

Your contributions to the education technology field have really made a difference. If you win the battle and leave "this cancer thing" behind -- I've no doubts that you'll be able to pick up your career path right where you left it.

I understand the feeling of loss - and admire your courage in letting go for now to focus on wellness.

on Friday, August 4th, Ellen E said

That's how I feel when I don't get a weekly "Doug fix". I shall miss you so much around here, but cling (like a duck on a June bug)to the idea that this is temporary and you WILL return!

on Friday, August 4th, Linda said

If you need a walking buddy let me know. When I am in town, I would love have someone to walk and talk with.