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03/30/2006: "All in the Family"

The past few weeks has brought me back in touch with one of my cousins. Our fathers are brothers and so much alike. We were discussing the conflicts that we have had with our dads over the years and how it seems to be something Prouty boys are born to do. As my cousin is deciding to start a family himself, I suggested that he look at his relationship with his dad and how that will affect his parenting. I so often hear the echoes of my parents when I talk to my kids.

My son Nick is now 11 years old and a beautiful child. He is witty and funny and interested in the sciences. We do have our conflicts, most of it around him getting his homework done. But he rarely challenges us and takes on chores with little complaint. He has been a true bright light for us.

My daughter Alex is 9 and sweet as well. She has been a challenge for us as she is in the middle of the autistic spectrum. She was six years old before she slept through the night. She would usually wake around 2 AM screaming and crying. Jeanette and I would trade off nights and often find ourselves driving around the neighborhood so other family members could sleep. We recently confessed to each other that the thought had crossed our mind on those early mornings, that not returning would be a blessing for the others still in the house. She continues to be a great deal of work and source of stress. Today, we are thankful for her and wouldn't trade. She has taught us so much and those lessons have helped us deal with our current crisis.

I would give my life up any day to save my kids'. I think that is a force of nature. When I spend time reflecting on my life and narrow it down to what is really important, it is the children. Not only my own, but the ones I have been able to touch as an educator. I am so glad that teaching was my calling and that even as I moved from the classroom to administration, I could tie my work back to children.

I am thankful for all the people that raise, care for and educate children. A good friend of mine cried the other day when talking about her own 30 year old son who is having work trouble. They are always "your children."

I am also so thankful for my parents (for I must remember that I too and someone's child), my brothers, my children and most of all, my wife Jeanette. I love you all.

Replies: 3 Comments

on Monday, April 3rd, Adrienne DeWolfe said

Hey, Doug,
This has been a challenging year for me balancing family and career. What with a new baby, two daycares, and and a four-year-old eager for my time... however, everytime I've had to stay home with a sick baby, miss a meeting, leave a little early for daycare pick-up or just simply "take a break from my laptop," as William requests, I know that my priorities are in the right place. You help me remember that too! I'm so glad you are taking this time to be with your family and dedicate your self to fighting this cancer -- your priorities are in the right place. Thanks for sharing your insightful thoughts!
Your friend,
Adrienne

on Thursday, March 30th, Di said

Hi Doug,
Saying 'hello' and how much I am thinking about and praying for you. Whenever I hear your name, I immediately have the mental image of a long-ago Halloween at CHS, and your "backwards" get-up. May this cancer go backwards and OUT of your body. Much love to you and yours,
di

on Thursday, March 30th, Dave said

Thanks Doug. Even at my age you made me rethink "my children" perspective. Life without them would have never been the same. May The Lord make His face shine upon you and your family. Dave, Linda G's dad. ps - my family physican has an autistic son about 40 yrs. of age , still home and a daily challenge and loved abundantly.